Welcome to a new feature in the Shapermint Blog, where we ask our favorite bloggers to weigh in on body positivity, discovering their inner worth and learning to love themselves. First up is Kayra, an East Coast gal that has been living in St. Louis with her husband and daughter for two years now. She loves sharing her thoughts on fashion, travel, home decor, a healthy lifestyle, education and her efforts to maintaining a work-life balance on her blog, KayraMerrills.com. Follow her on Instagram!
How Becoming a Mom Taught Me To Finally Love My Body By Kayra Merrills
I can still remember a key moment in my life, probably around 10th grade, when I woke up to bigger hips, full breasts, and a bigger butt. It was as if my body did a complete transformation overnight without my approval. In this body transformation, there were days that I felt like a beautiful young woman and there were also days where my body’s curviness overwhelmed me.
I used to compare my clothing fit with other young girls, and I envied how many girls didn’t have to deal with curves that contributed to a shapely look in clothing. I would try my best to run in the mornings and engage in crazy diets to lean out the best that I could. But it wasn’t sustainable - and I would gain the weight back.
In college, I began to accept my curviness. But there were still times where my insecurities would hit me and I would begin to try to exercise with more intensity, in an effort to lose weight to be this ideal body vision in my head.
Throughout the colder months, I remember not feeling as self conscious because dressing with layers was flattering in my mind - those months where when I felt the most confident. But as the warmer months came around, I knew that I needed to make sure that I was exercising consistently and eliminating foods that made me gain weight.
Looking back, the act of trying to be a healthier and a more active person for spring and summer was not a bad choice. The problem was the lack of acceptance that I had for the fullness of my body. It was as if I felt that I needed to fix something that was wrong.
It wasn’t until I became a mother of a young girl that I realized the beauty of my own female body and how much my body was a beautiful gift, perfectly designed for me. My body gave me the ultimate gift in the world - becoming a mother. The way that my body was built to perfectly serve my daughter’s needs, and offered her the safety and nurturing space to thrive and grow, prompted me to respect my body in a way that I was incapable of doing before.
I can genuinely say that, now that I’m in my 30s, I have developed a level of acceptance, self-confidence, and self-love for my curves that I didn’t have when I was younger.
My shape is what makes me unique, what allows me to feel like myself when I put on a pair of jeans, and what gives me joy, even when wearing fitted dresses. The shapewear I get at Shapermint is also a lovely addition to my wardrobe. It enhances my curves, my natural beauty, and lifts and smooths whenever I feel I might need it.
As I look at my daughter and see her radiant beauty in every step that she takes, I truly hope she never doubts her beauty. I hope she recognizes that there is nothing wrong with her body and that her curves are gifts, specifically designed for her.